Decisions
There i a famous quote in Matrix- The movie, "Life is a set of choice; you make a decision and open the door knowing not what lies in store for you". Nothing can sum up what i am upto now more aptly that this. Why on earth i am repeating the course. Where is the enthusiasm that i had for an MBA last year. I believe my decision to come here was based upon the best raional decisions i have taken in my life, but did i consider the motivational aspects of the same, given my nature which never wants to do the same thing again?
Its tough to analyse the implication this decision has had or will have on me. Of course at one corner i am very happy that i have an opportunity to belong to the elite XL community but on the other hand i have to endure what i am going through now.
But the question lingers in my mind, if, what i am going through now is just a self made obsession that is of no importance to me now. Why i cant shed the baggage that i am cayying right now and start all over again as if nothing happened. Am i worried that i have lost one year of my life for nothing. Or is it just plain jealosy to see my friends get a head start of one year.
Everyone tells you that one year will not matter in the long run specially when you have come to a place like XL. But how do i convince myself that this one year is worth the wait. Although i know nothing could be done now. I guess its plain inertia that is playing on me. I think i hust need to get back or rather get into the scheme of things.
But the big question is that how do i get into the scheme? Just jump in.
I think the answer lies in the movie Rocky V, where he speaks of fear within, that grips human beings. I agree all these issues have cropped up in my mind plainly due to the inherent fear of failure. Is it really justified or am i afraid to prove myself again?
The challenge right now is to overcome those fears and come back hard at what i was doing and doing well. I guess there is no need for me to fear fro there is no tomorrow. Am i afraid to speel out my fear? yes to a certain extent. ut i guess i need not worry cos as i believe, "If a guy has talent, then no force in the world can succed in subduing him". I just need to hold my fort and control over the negative emotions that have begun cropping up.
Hope by the next time i post here, i am back to normal self and have kicked some good a**.
Live life XL size.
Kallappa
Its tough to analyse the implication this decision has had or will have on me. Of course at one corner i am very happy that i have an opportunity to belong to the elite XL community but on the other hand i have to endure what i am going through now.
But the question lingers in my mind, if, what i am going through now is just a self made obsession that is of no importance to me now. Why i cant shed the baggage that i am cayying right now and start all over again as if nothing happened. Am i worried that i have lost one year of my life for nothing. Or is it just plain jealosy to see my friends get a head start of one year.
Everyone tells you that one year will not matter in the long run specially when you have come to a place like XL. But how do i convince myself that this one year is worth the wait. Although i know nothing could be done now. I guess its plain inertia that is playing on me. I think i hust need to get back or rather get into the scheme of things.
But the big question is that how do i get into the scheme? Just jump in.
I think the answer lies in the movie Rocky V, where he speaks of fear within, that grips human beings. I agree all these issues have cropped up in my mind plainly due to the inherent fear of failure. Is it really justified or am i afraid to prove myself again?
The challenge right now is to overcome those fears and come back hard at what i was doing and doing well. I guess there is no need for me to fear fro there is no tomorrow. Am i afraid to speel out my fear? yes to a certain extent. ut i guess i need not worry cos as i believe, "If a guy has talent, then no force in the world can succed in subduing him". I just need to hold my fort and control over the negative emotions that have begun cropping up.
Hope by the next time i post here, i am back to normal self and have kicked some good a**.
Live life XL size.
Kallappa
posted by Kallappa @ 7:07 AM
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